And we're back...

After a few months in the cyber wilderness, that and settling back into life in Cape Town after being a citizen of the Northern Hemisphere for a year, I have given the blog a mild makeover and decided to brag about some of my road trip exploits around the United States of America. However, 14 000km (or about 9000 miles) in 5 weeks definitely deserves its own post, so watch this space.

In the meantime I will be casting my sometimes cynical, sometimes sarcastic and often times skeptical eye over life, in and around Cape Town.

Right now though I need to be part of an ever so important discussion over who should win the prize for scholar of the year in grade 6 for 2008, cause it is so important who the top academic in the grade is when you're 12 years old.

Life's Cruel Blessings!

Life is governed by cycles. The cycles of the moon around the earth, the cycles of seasons, the cycles of man-made schedules that govern our days. There are beginnings and inevitably there are endings.

I have never been good at the endings part. The cycle of yet another academic school year has ended and some of the people I have had the incredible joy of meeting and becoming friends with are now moving on. It hurts! I have never been okay with idea of not seeing someone again, especially someone that I have become close with. I get it that feeling the sadness and the emptiness of that person’s departure indicates that the relationship was real and sincere, but it doesn’t make it easier.

An ending means that a new beginning is about to happen though. The cycle of life continues. The sadness will become bearable, and eventually fade, and the excitement of the adventure will arise, phoenix-like, from the ashes.

I once heard a saying;

“People come into our lives in three different ways,
Some, for a reason,
Some for a season,
And some for a lifetime!

To the wonderful people who have come into my life for a reason, or for this season, I salute you and thank you. Know that your departure is not taken lightly. Those that have come into it for a lifetime, I’ll see you soon!

61º N 150º W and then some…

I have been back from Alaska for almost ten days now and I haven’t been able come up with some smart angle to describe my trip into the Arctic Circle. But then that is perhaps the exact effect that Alaska has on you. Not the proverbial ‘speechless’ description, but simply that Alaska is not fancy, it doesn’t try to be clever, and it doesn’t have illusions of grandeur. Alaska simply is. It is real, it doesn’t make excuses, it is raw and it is unforgiving. At the same time its pure beauty reaches in and touches you in a way that you can never forget.

I spent a week in various places, and in that time I came across very few people who were born and bred Alaskans. Every one of these Alaskan immigrants that I spoke to made an almost identical comment. The comment was one that I too uttered on more than one occasion in that week. The comment being, “Alaska is a place I always wanted to see!” They had all heeded the call and found some way to make a stay of varying lengths in America’s 49th state. Many of the guide books and biographies set in Alaska make a similar statement intimating that a little piece of Alaska stays with you when you leave. That little piece that stays with you, in my opinion, is a simple unadorned realism that transcends the superfluous nature of living in modern times.

But before I get ahead of myself and come across as a Zen touting tree hugger, let me explain my reason for heading north into the Arctic over Spring break, while all my colleagues headed south to the equator. As a young kid I saw an advert for J&B whiskey on television featuring the Aurora Borealis and a Polar Bear. I don’t recall the connection between the scenery and the whiskey, but I do know that those swirling, dancing lights left an impression on me. Witnessing the Northern Lights became one of the things that I had to do in my lifetime. And let me tell you it is so worth the time and money spent to get to Alaska. Nobody can actually describe what it is like actually witnessing the Aurora Borealis first hand, and I am not even going to try, save to say that for about two hours around midnight of March 17, 2008, I was oblivious to the -30 degree temperatures and was completely in awe of one of natures most incredible phenomenon. I have included some photos below that give you an idea of what I witnessed, but again they don’t even come close.

After that the rest of my trip was spent dog sledding, snowmobiling, flight-seeing and just simply ‘being’ in the raw beauty of Alaska. I toured around Fairbanks, popped in to see Father Christmas in North Pole (yes, it is an actual place, and no, he wasn’t home), strolled around downtown Anchorage and just for fun went snowmobiling again.

In Transit.

I am busy sorting through my digital mountain of photos from Alaska. As soon as I have cropped, lightened, darkened and generally edited to my liking I will post a report on my completely phantasmagorical trip. In the meantime I want to share some of the observations I made while in transit between the East and West coasts of this country.

1. Why is there Braille lettering on the overhead reading light button? Did they think this through completely?
2. Why is there a disposal specifically designed and marked for hypodermic needles in the lavatory of the airplane. I don’t even want to know who is using so many needles that they deemed it necessary to have a specific disposal.
3. The little Asian woman in the seat across the aisle from me is tapping her foot in time to my music. The interesting thing about this is that the music is in my head!! Freaky!
4. In the 60 minutes I have been sitting in the waiting area of the Minneapolis airport, there have been at least 8 public announcements for people to retrieve lost items from security. I can understand misplacing your keys. I can understand leaving a book somewhere. I can even see how you might forget your coat. But I am having trouble understanding how you can misplace your fishing rod.
5. Some completely useless facts from the pilot. The airplane weighs about 115 000 kg. 15 000 kg is accounted for by passengers. The flight from Minneapolis to Anchorage used 24 000 liters of fuel.
6. The 10 year old kid in the seat next to me convinced me that the chewing gum he offered me just before landing had edible paper around it. It didn’t. His response; “If the worst thing that happens to us today is that we eat a bit of paper, I think we’re in good shape!”

In honour of peanut butter.

I like peanut butter. Many people my age, and many younger and older than I, graduated from school with the help of the energy and the nutritious ingredients on a good old fashioned peanut butter sandwich. Not only were they a good breaktime snack, but peanut butter sandwiches were also a good form of hard currency. I occasionally traded them for cheese sandwiches with the boy at the desk next to me and I swapped out with the boy at the desk behind me for his strawberry jam sandwiches. Peanut butter sandwiches are also the food fight weapon of choice. Nothing sticks quite like peanut butter when hurled at the right velocity! Peanut butter sandwiches are also the ultimate fast food. What is quicker to prepare than a layer of creamy (or crunchy) peanut butter on a slice of bread. Peanut butter can also be accessorised. It is easy to add a smattering of jam (or jelly if you're American), syrup or even honey. Peanut butter is ageless, which doesn't mean it keeps forever, but rather that I still enjoy a peanut butter sandwich 16 years after completing high school.

However, yesterday, my world was thrown into temporary turmoil. While choosing my next jar of peanut butter, I came across two new somewhat disturbing options. Cashew butter and almond butter! When did peanuts' snooty cousins, cashew and almond become a spread? Why would you even want to mess with the legacy that is peanut butter? Now while I will try anything at least once, and I am aware of the health benefits of both cashews and almonds, I am proud to say that I placed a jar of organic peanut butter into my shopping trolley and brought it home with me.

Long live peanut butter!

Environmentally Friendly!

I have been meaning to post this picture for a while now. Don't you love how in their efforts to keep the gardens and greenways of our neighbourhood neat, tidy, and presentable, the local government has provided these posts with a supply of plastic, non-biodegradable bags for you to put your dogs biodegradable doodoo in when you take them out for a walk! And should you be caught allowing your dog to head the call of nature and not pick the biodegradable deposit up, not put it into one of the non-biodegradable bags and not throw the non-biodegradable bag into the convenient receptacle, in order that it be taken to a landfill somewhere with kilotons of other non-biodegradable waste, they will fine you up to $200. Does anyone else see the irony in this?

Rocket Scientists?

On my little sojourn into Houston, Texas we stopped by and visited the Johnson Space Centre. This is where all NASA's expeditions out of our atmosphere are controlled from. From the early days of the Apollo missions to the current Space Shuttle Atlantis expedition to the International Space Station. It is all watched over from there.

Part of the tour took us to the training facility where they have mock ups of the shuttle and the space station for the astronauts, engineers and scientists to muck about with. The funniest thing though was the warning sticker placed on a table in the training facility. I apologise for the poor picture quality but the table was reasonably far away.

I think the sticker speaks or itself. Apparently the more obvious dangers in life are not always that obvious if you are a rocket scientist.

Priorities?

So I went out this morning to shop for a few items of clothing. The items in question were a suit, which I had heard was on sale, a new pair of running shorts and some seriously thick socks for my coming trip to Alaska. What did I come home with? A case of beer and some toilet paper! Men! Go figure!

I would like to present the following explanation though, before you throw your head back in dismay, or disbelief, or complete amusement, whichever comes first. On my trip to Houston, Texas this weekend, fortune served me a Winter’s Bourbon Cask Ale at dinner. It is an auburn coloured seasonal ale that has been brewed with dark roasted caramel malts and then aged on bourbon oak casks and whole Madagascar vanilla beans. Needles to say you have to taste it to appreciate it. It is quite possible one of the finest beers I have tasted on my travels. Hence my reason for buying some when I happened to see it in the local wine and beer store. Ok, so I went looking for it.

PS. The toilet paper purchase has no reflection on the ale. We simply needed toilet paper in our apartment!

Freezing Rain!

Living in Africa can limit your winter weather experience to some degree. Not that I am complaining at all. I love the weather patterns we have. Find me someone who grew up on the highveld and didn't love its awesome summer afternoon lightening storms and thundershowers and I will show you someone who should probably immigrate back north again. While it does get cold in SA, it rarely goes into the really low single digits and it is a severe winter that sees subzero temperatures, unless you live in Southerland or Bethlehem of course.

This rambling discourse, in case you are wondering, serves as an introduction to the reason I am at home posting this blog, and not at school enriching the lives of my students. I received a phone call at exactly 5:02 this morning, via the phone-tree, that schools have been closed for the day due to the "freezing rain" that fell during the night. Not a blizzard or heavy snow, but "freezing rain."

Now this "freezing rain" is a concept that, until this morning anyway, I had not been able to get my head around. Freezing Rain? What exactly is "Freezing Rain"? I had images in my mind of the DC/Marvel character Subzero, cruising round on his frozen surfboard shooting streams of frozen water at people and things making them freeze instantly in their tracks. I had images of droplets of rain suspended, or frozen, in midair, with people having to walk around them as they made their way in and out of buildings and cars. I had images of magical drops of rain that turned your entire car or personage into a statue the moment it hit you.

As it turns out, it is none of the above. What it actually is is the fact that it is so cold outside, that the raindrop freezes almost immediately after it makes contact with any exposed surface. When enough raindrops accumulate and freeze on any flat surface it forms a slick plane of ice that is usually not visible to the naked eye. This of course makes walking on the sidewalk a little tricky. More to the point though, is that the layer of ice that forms on the road is also invisible and potentially deadly. And with 95% of students being transported to and from school on the public school's bus service, they decided it was safer to keep the students at home for the day. Hence the reason I am here rambling on about the weather.

Personally I still prefer the “Subzero superhero” explanation, but either way I get the day off school. I took a couple of pictures this morning, without managing to fall on my arse, although I did come close a couple of times. If nothing else, nature is a superb artist!

You can't make this stuff up!

Two things;

1. I have yet to find someone who can explain to me why they call their spelling competitions here in the US, a "Spelling Bee". Not my team leader, not my principal, nor any other member of the faculty has been able to explain that to me. Hmm!

2. Upon returning to school the day after receiving a spelling guide, given to the winner and runner up, in my class Spelling Bee, the young student in question turns to me and says, "Wow, there are some interesting words in here. Some words I knew like 'magnificient' but some words, like 'megalopolis' I thought were made up words from Sponge Bob!"

You just have to love teaching on days like that!

Things that wouldn't work in SA!

Ten things that wouldn't work in SA, but are part of every day life here in the US.

1. Crossing a road in a parking lot with 98% certainty that cars will stop for you.

2. Self-checkout aisles in supermarkets.

3. Leaving your bicycle outside a convenience store without locking it up.

4. Leaving your kid's toys out on the front lawn.

5. Getting an awesome tax payout after only working for 5 months. This in addition to the fact that it takes two weeks from submission of forms to payout!

6. Leaving your cell phone somewhere and having it returned to you.

7. Being able to buy marshmallow in a jar. Its called fluff! Seriously! Apparently you put it onto a sandwich with peanut butter.

8. Leaving your coat or jacket on your seat in a sports arena while you go and buy more beer.

9. Buying tequila at a sports match. (I think I've spoken enough about this though!)

10. Calling your used car dealership "Koons!"

American Natural Roadkill Museum

Seriously! While walking through the American Natural History Museum in New York we came across the following exhibit. I really am not sure of its purpose. The rest of the museum has very tasteful and delicately laid out displays of all manner of animals from around the world, all in various mid-action poses. They have endless halls of reconstructed dinosaur fossils, some reaching 10 meters or more into the air. They have a wonderful temporary display of mythical beasts and creatures. They have whole halls showing time lines that span trillions of years in the evolution of the creatures on our planet. And then you come across this. You have to start asking questions when you see displays in a premier national museum of what in my mind is clearly roadkill!

NEW YORK!!!!

To be completely honest, New York kind of snuck up on me. “How can one of the biggest and most famous cities in the world sneak up on you?” I hear you ask. Well, firstly I was fairly engrossed in the movie that was being shown on the bus, and, secondly, it was raining, overcast and generally gloomy outside, all of which “hazed” our view from the bus. It was only when someone on the bus gasped at what must have been their first sighting that we looked out of the foggy windows to see the grey, New York City skyline. Our first real view of the city was a momentary sighting as we headed down towards the Lincoln Tunnel, which takes you under the Hudson River, and brings you out right in the city for about two blocks before the bus once again dives underground into the multi-story, underground bus terminal.

From the moment you step out of the bus terminal though, your senses are assaulted, and the visual, aural and olfactory bombardment doesn’t cease until you leave. Not once in the 6 days that we spent in New York did the noise subside, not once did the lights stop flickering and flashing, and not once did we cross a street, without seeing some guy selling either honey-roasted nuts and/or hot dogs, which filled the air immediately around him with, shall we say, 'interesting' odors. That was in addition to the non-stop chicory aromas permeating from the Starbucks that are located on virtually every corner. In fact, on our second or third day, we were going to have a contest to see who could spot the most Starbucks from the top of the open top bus tour, but as we were already up to 5 before we had even traveled two or three blocks towards the Uptown area, and had missed several points of interest being pointed out by our guide, we decided to halt the game. (For the record, I was winning though!)

It is true what they say; New York, literally, does not sleep. On every occasion that I got up in the night, to head the call of nature, there were always the sounds of people laughing and shouting, cars hooting, trucks unloading goods, and emergency vehicles blaring their sirens.

We were fortunate enough to get accommodation right in the centre of Manhattan, which meant we were only a few blocks up from Times Square, only a few blocks down from Central Park and only a few blocks west of 5th Avenue. In fact, our apartment was in a building that is on the corner of W 53 Street and Broadway. The Tonight Show, with David Letterman, is recorded in a studio that takes up most of the one side of the building that we stayed in. And no, we didn’t see David!

I could go on and on about New York and the myriad of things to see and do. In the 6 days we spent there we were on the go all day every day, and most nights, and only scratched the surface. For the sake of brevity then, I have made a [short?] list of the things that stood out for me. I have also included a few of the over 400 photos I took while in NYC. (Thank goodness for digital cameras! Are you hearing me BCB?)

1. Times Square at night.
2. Times Square in the day. (Times Square is just really cool all the time. Except perhaps on New Year’s Eve, when you need to share it with about a million other people all hoping to catch a glimpse of the giant electronic bauble, which descends to mark the New Year slower than a scene from Titanic. In fact it probably takes longer to drop than the Titanic itself took to sink.
3. Starbucks lattes and Starbucks hot chocolate when it was cold!
4. Our guide telling anyone on board our open top bus with scruples to look left, while showing us the only “clothing optional yoga studio” on the right. They must have been on a break though, as there was nobody inside!
5. Pizza at Angelo’s on Broadway!
6. Greenwich Village. Home to odd people, delicious delis and interesting architecture. It is the one place in NYC that I would definitely visit again. The restaurants are original, affordable and serve good food. Well the one Mexican Restaurant we went to was.
7. The Empire State Building – from the outside. Getting to the top is a minor mission. Unless of course you are Spiderman. Even the supposedly “fast-track” lanes can still take you over an hour.
8. “Top of the Rock” observatory at the very top of the Rockefeller Building. Now that’s what I’m talkin’ about! It takes you 20 minutes from entering the building to getting out of the elevator onto the deck at the top. And it cost half of what you pay to go up the Empire State Building. The views in my opinion were better, the service outstanding and the building itself was spectacular.
9. Grand Central Station!
10. The unexpected jewel of a discovery; the fresh produce market at Grand Central Station.
11. Central Park in any way you want to look at it. Except of course from the smelly back seat of one of the horse drawn carriages that circle the lower east corner of the park in an unending sausage machine cycle. The 20 minute ride costs a small fortune and its flippin’ freezing. But on the other hand, when you are only likely to be in NYC once, I guess it’s worth it.
12. Chinchins Chinese restaurant and the crazy dancing waiters, as well as Jimmy the awesome owner, manager and host.
13. The 'free' Staten Island Ferry at sunset with views of the Statue of Liberty and the Manhattan skyline.
14. Seeing a show on Broadway! Okay, so the production of Hairspray, that we watched wasn’t much better than your average high school musical, but it was a fun evening non-the-less.
15. The “H2O” exhibit, the “Dinosaurs” IMAX film and the “Cosmic Collision” show in the planetarium at the American Museum of Natural History.

Crossing over with Apple!

It has finally happened! I gave in! I crossed over to the techno-dark side. After swearing blindly that I couldn’t see the sense in having earphones jammed into my ears while doing exercise, and coming up with so many reasons as to why it is unsafe and just downright ridiculous, I crossed over tonight and joined the ever-growing number of people who wear some sort of MP3 player while exercising. Having received an Apple ipod as a gift at Christmas this year, and finally loading some music onto it, I took it to gym with me and ran my regular 5km on the treadmill, while listening to some excellent 80s music. I couldn’t help but laugh at the irony of hearing Mr. Roboto by Styx half way through my run.

An old friend and a new city!

Back when I was a scrawny teenager embarking on my high school career I became friends with a guy called Ryan. Ryan was born in the USA, but as a baby moved to South Africa with his parents. As teenagers we were both of the adrenaline-seeking persuasion and would spend afternoons and weekends sneaking into places where we probably really shouldn’t have, in order to find new and exciting places to rip up on our skateboards. (Although I can’t prove it, I am going to boast that we, along with another mate Ralph, were the first and possibly only kids to sneak in and skate on the roof of the Arwyp Medical Centre in Kempton Park. I can see my mother shaking her head as she reads this little boastful admission.) When not skateboarding we would take Ryan’s Kawasaki off-road motorcycle and head at break-neck speeds along the sandy trails and paths around the outskirts of the neighbourhoods in which we lived. In hindsight we probably should have been wearing something more protective than the t-shirts and jeans that we had on. (But Mom, if you are reading this, know that we did at least wear a helmet.) Irresponsible and slightly dangerous choices aside though, with the exception of a few cuts, scrapes and bruises, we came through it unharmed. The only possible negative side effect that my mother might argue is that it was these little excursions with Ryan that probably fuelled my current penchant for scuba-diving, mountain biking, bungee jumping, and my desire to still go skydiving. Physical dangers aside, our extra-curricular pursuits were wholesome, outdoor activities and we never once felt the need or desire to experiment with drugs, alcohol or cigarettes. In fact, by the time that Ryan and his parents moved back to the USA at the end of 1993, we had never once shared a beer or gone out to a club, pub or bar together.

Unfortunately Ryan and I lost contact with each other for the next 12 years and it was only through a set of fortunate circumstances that I managed to track him down again. As a result of the combination this good fortune and the timing of my little adventure to the USA, I was able to not only catch up and spend Christmas with a dear old friend, but also visit another city for the first time. So while Ryan didn’t become the storm-chasing climatologist I had always imagined him to be, he does still ride and race motorcycles, and he owns his own production company, called Lionstarfilms, which makes corporate video for many of Atlanta’s and the US’s top companies. And on top of that he makes a pretty darn good tour guide of Atlanta as well. And as neither of had a skateboard handy we decided to sit down and enjoy a drink together for the first time.

Atlanta really is a huge city. In fact, as a result of its location and not being impeded by any physical landform, it is continuing to grow sideways rather than. That is not to say that the city doesn’t have an abundance of plate glass and steel skyscrapers. It has that and more. There are the old, historical neighbourhoods, the esoteric, eclectic, and alternative suburbs and the trendy, yuppie post-modernistic design, living developments, all thrown into the mix too. The one warming observation that I did make while visiting all these areas though, was that it is clean. The city definitely takes pride in its appearance. The city can also brag being Martin Luther King Jr’s hometown, as well as being the venue for two excellent tourist traps, the Georgia Aquarium and the World of Coca Cola. I also got to experience my first ice-hockey game while in Atlanta. The Atlanta Thrashers verse the Toronto Canadiens ice-hockey game proved to be a really fortunate game to attend, as not only did the game end in a tied score, resulting in an exciting and relatively rare penalty face off, but I had the hilarious pleasure of witnessing someone proposing on the big screen to his girlfriend. (And here we thought it just happened in the movies!)

All in it was both an exciting and nostalgic trip to Atlanta for Christmas.

If you're gonna drink together why not make it single malt, 15 year old, at the top of the Westin Hotel, in a revolving restaurant on the 70th floor, while enjoying the night lights of Atlanta?

$50 first prize if you can tell me where the puck is?

Beluga whales, which occur naturally in the Arctic Ocean, but have been brought to the Georgia Aquarium by way of Mexico! Huh!

So how much pressure can that glass take anyway?

The World of Coca-Cola!

High fructose corn syrup anyone?

Not to be too obvious, but, um, Atlanta at night!

And while we are stating the obvious, Atlanta's skyline during the day!

Body Clock!

Having grown up and gone though my entire primary, secondary and tertiary education in South Africa, a certain cycle of Southern Hemisphere life is entrenched in me. In South Africa, as with most Southern Hemisphere schools, the academic year begins a week or two into January. The smell of lush, green grass on the school sports fields, freshly mowed after the summer rains, heralds the arrival of a new year of possibilities, a new year of challenges, and a new year of mischief of some kind or other. The school year then plays out in the same routine. Four academic quarters of about 10 or 11 weeks filled with mornings in the classroom and afternoons out on the sports fields. During the year, each academic quarter is separated by a much anticipated break of anywhere between ten days to three weeks. During these vacations we would have the much needed “down time” from school, running around with our friends, riding our bicycles, swimming and generally getting up to innocent mischief. Come November/December and the end of the fourth quarter, we would write our end of year exams, attend the final assembly and prize giving and happily run the teachers over in our enthusiasm to get out the school gates and start six weeks of glorious summer vacationing. As well as occasional family trips to either the beach or mountains in one or other part of our beautiful country, these holidays would also bring with them Christmas and New Year celebrations, ultimately signifying the end of another year and the completion of another turn of the cycle.

You can imagine then my complete sense of having my world turned upside down by coming to teach in the Northern Hemisphere. If you have grown up in the Northern Hemisphere, then of course this cycle of things would make complete sense. But to me, starting the school year in August, having the academic quarters measured by report ‘due dates’ and not holidays, only two short school breaks (between 3 and 6 school days off for each) for Thanksgiving and Christmas/New Years, neither of which signifies the start of a new year, all in the first 18 weeks of teaching, just sends my whole body clock out of sync. You can also understand then, how my mind is telling my body that the time of year is early January, which is associated with the first cutting of the lush, green grass, afternoon thunderstorms, and the beginning of a new cycle, yet my body is telling my mind that it is 2 degrees Celsius outside, the trees are bare and that running around in a pair of swimming shorts all day is just not an option right now.

I guess the point of all this is that is amazing how our lives are so dominated by routines, cycles and comfort zones, and it is only when we take ourselves out of those routines completely that we become aware of them. Therefore I am going to go and crack a beer on this frosty Saturday here in the Northern hemisphere and celebrate this wintery January and all its un-cyclical beauty, all while quietly praying for a couple of snow days.